Posted by: Johnny Texter | September 30, 2009

Master Plan…Revealed.


Alright. Here’s the plan. I figured out the master plan from the genius known as Eric Mangini. It’s September 30th, 2009 and I can tell you who will be the starting quarterback for the Cleveland Browns in September of next year. I know, crazy, huh? Will it be Derek Anderson? No. How about Brady Quinn? No. Brett Favre? Man, who knows! Let me introduce you to your new QB, Cleveland…Brett Ratliff. I hope you’ve heard of him. You’ll want to buy his #5 jersey next year when we all foolishly believe now that he will be the Lebron James of the Browns. Here’s a little Brett Ratliff info for you…played college ball at Utah, went undrafted to the New York Jets, hasn’t taken a snap in a regular season game. Feel good about 2010 friends? Okay, so now you’re confused. (Understandably so, too.) I’ll explain my madness, and by “my madness” I do mean Eric’s. The Browns acquired Brett Ratliff during this year’s draft, as the Jets moved up to get USC Quarterback Mark Sanchez. (Jets 3-0, Browns 0-3…terrific.) Brett, is third on the depth chart behind now starter Derek Anderson, and recently benched Brady Quinn. After 10 quarters Eric Mangini has apparently declared Brady unfit for the job. Is that why he dropped so far in the draft a few years back? Enter Derek Anderson, who in 2 quarters throws 3 interceptions. It’s just a matter of time…Now, I don’t mean to say that one quarterback is going to save this team. Let’s be honest…Jamal Lewis may be on his last leg…literally. Braylon, can only catch a cold. Our defense? Is that what we are calling it? Maybe Anderson and Quinn split the time the rest of this year. Maybe there’s other intellects in the league who give us a second round pick for Anderson. Quinn, (if he’s smart) asks for a trade. And there you have it. Ratliff steps into his new role next year and maybe we resign Dorsey as the backup. Mission accomplished Eric. The guy who was to start with the departure of Brett Favre will now be your guy to start next year for the Browns. And the rebuilding continues, again…joy.


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